1. one might wonder what a skinnygirl has to worry about. while this skinnygirl considers a boob job, it's hard not to admit that boyfriend and i do enjoy cyclically expanding/contracting breast tissue. but here is something that i can't change: the size of my ears. I was looking at my head from behind in the bathroom mirror (checking out my GORGEOUS hair because i want to sell it) and i looked at my ear and was for a moment reminded of "HEY YOU GUY-AAAYYYYYSSSSSSSS" ... you know, that retarded ogre in the goonies; he had tiny ears, no? i'm self-conscious of my ears looking under-developed and deformed.

2. i'm believing in marriage less and less. hollywood people make a mockery of it - just getting married to help their careers. people i knew in high school getting married too early - and consequently divorced - because the "happily ever after" story had been carved into their brains since birth. so, so many stories we tell ourselves. that's why i had such a hard time when i was dating - i was caught between two stories: the remnants of the happily-ever-after preached by the cult, and the jet-setter who didn't need a boyfriend but nevertheless wondered why each new guy lasted on average two weeks. why is it that i always tended towards the long-term relationship? i blame it on the adaptations women have evolved after generations. why get married? what is the point? ok, there are good reasons to get married: so your kids aren't bastards, the benefits when it comes to insurance, property, citizenship, etc (in fact i saw a personal ad on craigslist - i only read the platonic-only ones - where the guy offered to pay a woman to marry him for citizenship purposes - he would pay for everything). so i guess it's not all bad. but you better have a fucking good concept of yourself before you bring someone else into the storm!

3. sadly, i fear i have to leave the exchange program kids. on both practical and moral grounds; practical because i have to spend my time looking for a job and/or producing something, and moral because they send out a "patriotic" flyer saying that you should host a foreign student to "combat the poisonous propaganda which is deliberately being spread about our country." (poisonous propaganda = THE TRUTH!)

4. i'm crocheting. my friend liz is a knitter. we'd like to sell stuff. so i'm coming up with a few prototypes of pieces and patterns - speaking of which, i have to photograph and print and put in my sketchbook. then i can undo the first prototype, make changes, and do the next one. until i perfect my product.