getin' all cultural

that thing i said about my brother's ex coming to her senses? nah i don't think so anymore.

my mom and i were in his room with him as he explained this job opportunity he had heard of, she picked some clothes off the floor, and i played with Alice, the rat. my brother is also picking up things here and there and he goes whoa, whose is this? as he holds up a small, white camisole. my mom looks at him funny and is like, DAVid DEEE! (his name... d is his middle initial.) he just kind of stood there laughing about it.

am feeling blah today. kind of bored, esp on the gettin'-some front (would say "romantic" but i don't believe in romance.) and i'm not sure whether to be alarmed about this apathy or just be with it. i mean, i do have a candidate in mind but i refuse to allow myself to open up the flood gates of hell... i mean, um, allow any kind of feeling to break free. because he is going to europe for the next year, and he is a bit younger than i am. it makes no sense to start anything now. but i'm conflicted. on the one hand i feel like i'm betraying myself if i go and be with someone else when i really want to be with him. but on the other hand i don't really believe in holding out for someone you can't have immediately.

*************
that was the extent of my thoughts last night when i decided to go upstairs to watch Coupling (the brit version, of course) and read. am bored again today; am wishing he would call, thinking about him a bit, would like to see him, but would rather spend an evening in bed by myself reading than destroying what is left of my chin making out with him. not that making out ever directly involves my chin; only when he hasn't shaved (shaven?) for a couple of days.

have seen some very interesting television. guns, germs and steel is a documentary that's on PBS (based on the book of the same title.) it's an interesting theory and a lot of it makes sense. now the fact that i'm white just seems like the effect of pure dumb luck. europeans were close to asia so they could pick up more (such as agriculture, writing, algebra) than could, say, the incas because they were relatively isolated from other civilizations that have developed a system of writing (the aztecs? or was it the mayas? one of the civilizations in present-day mexico. or perhaps both.) another thing that that europeans had to their advantage was that the eurasian continent spanned about 8000 miles from east to west. so people could migrate without too difficult of adjustments climate and vegetation wise because they would stay mostly at the same-ish latitudes. the case with the americas however was that america spans about 8000 miles north to south. so civilizations encountered much more difficulty migrating between north and south because of the dramatic changes in climate and vegetation as one changes latitude. (of course how could you explain that the incan civilization stretched all the way from colombia to chile? maybe becase the climate of the higher elevation andes maybe could be a constant function regardless of latitude?) therefore the knowledge could not be spread from civilization to civilization as easily as it could be in eurasia. plus the lack of agriculture over here in america at that time prevented the kinds of diseases known to europeans, that sprouted up from having such close contact with livestock, and thus diseases such as smallpox were unknown in america, so their immune systems had no defense against them. ANYWAY that's just the second part. haven't seen the first part. conclusion is next monday. for more info go to the site, i have to go to bed!

also, there is an Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec and Montmartre exhibit (think moulin rouge; i believe John Leguizamo may even have played Toulouse) at the art institute of chicago. tix are 15 bucks unless you're a member. anyone wanna hop on your private jet and see it with me? am thinking of asking my grandparents and brother if they want to go b/c i know they're members (les grands-parents)...

et mes amis, je m'en vais parce que je dois me lever tot. bonne nuit.