wealth and a lower primate

this was hell week.

thursday i had to step out of the classroom and go hide in the literacy "closet" because i don't want to put my kids in a situation where they see their teacher cry. i mean, once they sense that you're about to cry or see it in your eyes or in the shaking of your voice, they shut up and listen. crying i think is more effective than yelling. because when they get you to the point of tears and SEE IT they get that they've done something wrong.

the last straw was when juan flicked a pencil by accident and the eraser hit me in the eye.

i've mentioned before how something will set me off in either direction... the time i couldn't stop laughing because the argentine guy who was speaking at this conference was kicking his foot under the table and his foot was hitting the table skirt around the table... it made me think of the symbolism of the foot poking through the table skirt, but mostly it made me think of a dog sniffing around under a sheet or a table and i couldn't stop laughing. also, once i was going to my first year spanish class (junior year of high school) and as i entered the trailer (it was during the high school's pre-upgrade years) a boy came storming out, hitting my forehead with the door. this set me off completely. i could not stop crying. i went to the nurse, got some ice. then i had physics. someone asked me what had happened and i started crying again.

this was an off week. i guess because it has been a very long time since we have had a full week. monday and tuesday and even wednesday were ok, but things fell apart thursday. it's because i was really tired wednesday night and instead of staying up later, i figured i would be better off if i went to bed. of course i didn't arrive at school until quarter till eight.

anyway it's friday now and i'd like to leave this week behind me.

*************
mr. p came over and we watched "l'auberge espagnol." i connected to it in some ways. if you haven't seen it it's about a french guy who goes to live in spain for a year. it reminds me somewhat of the time i spent in argentina. somewhat.

i also did cry when i left my parents to get on the plane.
i also was excited about living in a new place.
i did not, however, leave anyone "significant" behind.
i did make friends with foreigners,
though i did not live with them.
i did not have an affair with a married person.
i'm not sure that is where my life took off though.
i think maybe it was the first time i went to argentina (the salta trip, 2001)
i also learned a lot about myself.
but not enough. i needed another year here to sum it all up.
plus i've learned even more since then.

and i feel like i want to go away to live somewere besides the states again.

i'm feeling like it's an urge to migrate. last year at this time i wanted to go to chile. yes, i like what i'm doing, i really like my job despite the difficulties.

anybody know of a job where i can experience late spring through late summer all year round?

oh and my laugh for today: just recently when conan did the "if they mated" thing... the last one was par!s h!lton and her pet monkey... the "punchline"? let's see what we get when we mate wealth with a lower primate... and the resultant offspring was mister dubya himself. i love conan.