only your doctor can determine whether you need to lose weight

seeing as how there are sites dedicated to documenting cases where people have abused our legal system resulting in ridiculous warning labels on most products, i think i'd like to throw my hat in the game.

i opened up a piece of mail from my insurance company, something about a "health coach" available free of charge to help me make health-related decisions. quoting the letter:

do you want to... learn about diabetes? lose weight? quit smoking? know more about arthritis? talk to someone about your medications?

wait, you mean, i should talk to my doctor about losing weight? so this means, i have to lose weight? i'm fat? is that what they're saying?

see, as of yet there is no warning label in the fine print at the bottom about making sure you need to lose weight. y'all know i do not need to lose weight, it would, in fact, make me very ill.

apparently there is a hotline available 24/7 to talk to a "health coach"... the fact that it is 24/7 sends one phrase to my brain: CALL CENTER! which sends another word to my mind, OUTSOURCING! and a certain geographic area comes to my mind then too (NOT the USA).

i wonder what would happen if i called this number and said "well it said to call about losing weight...".

let's say they refer me to a doctor. i still have enough trust in the medical system here that if i saw a doctor about losing weight, s/he would take one look at me and refer me for a psych eval. but i'm cynical enough to have that small percentage of doubt in my mind.

of course i'd never do such a thing, risk my life to take advantage of the courts and fuck things up a little bit, but i would still like to see "weight management issues" in place of "weight loss."

think i got a discrimination suit?

KIDDING!