strike one

ok so i'm going to go against what my meds do for me and obsess a little. it's ok in moderation - everything in moderation.

today was strike one. yesterday The Crush had called and asked if i were free today. i told him i was; he suggested we do something. i said, ok, call me tomorrow because i lied to my boss and told her i was on a bathroom break and should be getting back now.

i called him around lunchtime because that was the only time i could talk. i don't consider that wrong because we already had quasi plans for tonight anyway. no answer. i left no message. i called again at seventeen (because i had to know wether to plan to go out tonight or not - i'm a girl and it's humid out and i left my hair curly so it's a frizzball - i need time to make myself presentable.) buuuutttttttt... he said something about having to help his brother out (he seems to be very close with his "brother.") but suggested doing something this weekend.

strike one: suggesting plans and not following through.

the reason i'm thinking in terms of strikes is that my shrink said i should follow my intuition more. i'm thinking of starting a database on the guys i date or in whom i have an interest. this is because for nearly three weeks i have been entering candidates into the database at work; each candidate/employee has a history. my history has over a hundred entries. if a candidate shows up late to an interview, that goes in his history. if he just doesn't show up without any call or anything, that goes in his history as well.

i'm totally just kidding though, that would probably drive me nuts.

so supposedly we're doing something this weekend but i won't count on it. i'm looking forward to reading my two augusten burroughs books tomorrow night, and my friend's housewarming party on saturday.

now for the obsessing.

he's the first guy since MP about whom i've actually thought i love his voice! it's true; for me it's a voice i could listen to forever. it's not severely masculine or anything, but has a kind of soothing tone to it. i like talking to him.

i keep thinking up all these conversations in my head, questions i could ask him. como sos con las chicas? entendes algo astronomia? entonces... sos mas como una estrella fugaz, un cometa, o una constellacion? y otra cosa. digamos que estas saliendo con cinco chicas. en una noche, como decidis con cual salir? cuales son las prioridades - saldrias con una que se entrega facilmente antes de que saldrias con una que te hace reir? and things of that nature.

maybe instead of strikes i should have a point system. will have to think about this... in the meantime i'll be "trimming" because i'm bored and that's another of my obsessions. i love the way it feels to pull hairs out of my skin. i'm weird that way.