back on the fatass train

look out fitness, i can eat again!

i had fried chicken for dinner. and salt and vinegar potato chips a few minutes ago. it still hurts a little, but it's a hurt i will tolerate because though i love ben and jerry's pistacio ice cream, i must balance out the sweet with salt and sour (don't want to be TOO sweet, my body would reject it because i am JUST NOT SWEET!).

so my brother is in a band. those of you who talk to me on a regular basis may know this already; i call him the Punk, or Mike, or Rophone (you know, from "microphone") because he is this very white boy with his curly fro dyed black. kind of looks like a microphone. today his band played at the Clearwater Theater in Dtown. my parents went, and they asked me if i'd like to come along. why not? so i went. they're not bad. i have to say, i think these kids are the future - i mean, not specifically my brother or his band, but i mean their whole trend. their form of music. isn't everybody tired of the same old shit that The Mix plays five times a day? i feel like once they're tired of that nickelback, depressing, i can't think of any other examples but you know what i mean, BULLSHIT, the mainstream is going to turn to people like my brother's band. it's funny; i mentioned yesterday about a song that was playing on TV: oh, this is The Killers. How did you know that? my brother asked. because i have their CD! i said. i had it first! he said. funny - i am eight years older than my brother and we have a CD in common. this is part of the reason i listen to so much music in spanish - the stuff produced in english in this country is so boring, depressing, formulaeic. i am beginning to like stuff like The Killers, Franz Ferdinand. it just sounds different. and i love what these boys are doing with their hair - it's really too bad i'm not eight years younger - they're growing it out but not too long, parting it to the side - and it's all so THICK and gorgeous! it reminds me of the boludos in buenos aires. i kept looking at their bass player - has lovely hair and a pretty face. i couldn't get over how calm he looked - kind of like the same expression that would be on his face if he were watching Tv.

my friend has enamored a colombian. lucky bitch. HA HA JUST KIDDING i know it is a complicated situation and I DO FEEL FOR YOU! seriously, when someone uses the L word it can only be one of two extremes: (x-named sinonym for good which i have never experienced) or profane. i only say that because when K left it on a VM the first thought to cross my mind was how profane. seriously - how could he have meant it? i am not of the school of girls that believe that after x amount of months the BF must say he loves me. NO i would prefer NOT TO HEAR THAT! especially if he thinks he is obligated. that is bullshit AND it places an unnecessary pressure on the relationship. like i would know, but i can imagine. i mean, if a guy i was dating told me that, it would necessarily place some kind of pressure that, if he were someone i liked a lot, would come back to haunt him once he wanted out. i mean, having told me that, i would probably (and i'm not saying it's right or wrong, it's just what i would do, looking at how i've acted in similar situations in the past) hold him to those words. and wether i verbalized it or not, i would still think but he said he loves me, didn't that count for something? no that is not a dimension you should introduce to your relationships unless ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. and don't think i am jaded and cynical - if you love someone you shouldn't have to say it. like saying those words is going to change how someone feels!

that's all i have to say tonight b/c my fingers are numb already. and i have to go back to work tomorrow. and i've had no cafeine this afternoon. god, last night i had the most interesting dreams.

future theme: assumptions (which one of my dreams last night had).